Chester Arthur and Modern Whigs

As were many early Republican leaders, Chester Arthur was initially a member of the Whig Party. In fact, he got into some sort of big fight over some candidate at college some time. Yeah. But he was a Whig.

Today there is a Modern Whig Party. It's not exactly the same as the original. In fact, I'd say it's fairly different since the new one is meant to be moderate while the old one was very sectional (kept mostly to New England) and class-ist (with support mostly from the richer).

Despite the old and new party's differences, I have decided to pull out the main aspects of the Modern Whig platform and analyze how Chester Arthur (as we know him from his presidency) would fit into the party.

*The party platform information has been copied and pasted directly from the Modern Whig Party's website.

FISCAL RESPONSIBILITY - Any action of the government must respect principles of fiscal responsibility and public accountability. Well, I'll be honest. President Arthur was a Republican of the Gilded Age. Monetarily, they weren't the most responsible. He attempted to lower the tariffs, but failed due to Congress marking them up time and time again until there was barely any lowering. Perhaps Chet would fit into this, but I can't be sure.

ENERGY INDEPENDENCE - Develop practical domestic energy sources to reduce dependence on foreign energy sources. This issue wasn't around in the 1880s, so while I'd love to tell you how great Chester Arthur is at energy independence, there is absolutely no criteria on which to analyze this.

STATE'S RESPONSIBILITY - Each state can generally determine its course of action based on local values and unique needs. This is kind of a vague position by the Modern Whig Party. How much is "generally?" I suppose in the eyes of some Chester would fit, in the eyes of others he wouldn't.

SOCIAL ACCEPTANCE - When the government is compelled to legislate morality, every citizen should be considered as equal. STOP SCREAMING CHINESE EXCLUSION ACT OF 1882 AT ME! Look, Arthur vetoed it once. He didn't want the Chinese to be excluded from citizenship. I have yet to figure out why he signed the bill the second time, but I'm sure it has to do with keeping him somewhat on the good side of Congress so he can do things like get the Pendleton Act passed later. I'm willing to vouch for Arthur on this one, I'm willing to bet many others are not.

EDUCATION AND SCIENTIFIC ADVANCEMENT - Increase public and private emphasis on math and science to promote American innovation to compete in the global economy. The Gilded Age was a time of great scientific advancement by Bell and Edison, but the government did little to support this. In fact, it was mostly supported by the rich people with trusts and monopolies and a lot of money. (Score one for laissez faire economics?) I doubt Elegant Arthur would oppose this, but he probably wouldn't support it either.

VETERANS AFFAIRS - Vigilant advocacy relating to the medical, financial, and overall well-being of our military families and veterans. Yeah, Grover Cleveland's pretty much the only Gilded Age president who doesn't fit into this category in the eyes of the people of that time, so Chester fits well enough.

DEVELOP REAL LEADERS - This central tenet of the Party is to help leaders both grow and to exhibit good citizenship through leadership. If Arthur didn't grow and exhibit good citizenship that he was lacking in his years under Conkling, then I couldn't say that anyone ever grows and exhibits good citizenship.

SELF DISCOVERY - As a Whig it is important to always be learning and growing. This means it is the Party's responsibility to pull information together and to help members discover for themselves their stance on any social topic. Chet suddenly found his own stances on topics when he became president and broke from strictly the stalwart faction views.

FOCUS ON LONG TERM PROBLEM SOLVING - We have developed into a reactive nation. The only issues being seriously considered are those who make the top of each media hour, however it is important to be talking about and solving issues that are foreseeable before they are major issues. Buildup of the navy which was sorely undersized and underpowered that led to a much better chance in the Spanish-American War count? I thought so.



So it seems Chester Arthur doesn't fit all that well into the Modern Whig Party looking strictly at these standards. However, you must consider that this party is a moderate party, searching mostly to garner to people with more middle views than either the Republicans or Democrats. Do I think they'd accept Chester Arthur into their party? Of course. Could he run for local office? Probably, especially since it's still a small party. Would they run him for president? Unlikely, since he doesn't encompass the official positions too strictly, but maybe as time passed if the party grew larger.

Twitter

The internet is a funny place.

I joined Twitter ages ago. ...Well ages in terms of IST (Internet Standard Time) at least. I had done absolutely nothing with it until a few weeks ago.

I began following some profiles. Two Chester Arthur profiles to be exact. Neither had updated too often or all too recently, but the matter was of principle really. I had chosen to be @chet21fan after all.

It was about this time I realized just how many profiles there are for presidents. With people who either know a bit about them, or at least attempt to be somewhat in character.

With this newfound knowledge, I followed a James Garfield and a Millard Fillmore. More recently, I found an amazing profile: @Mr_Lincoln where someone obsesses over Abe and posts regular updates about the significance of that day in Lincoln's life, how Justin Bieber sucks and people should obsess over a dead president instead, and occasionally some modern political jabbing. Seriously, if you have an account, you should be following him.

I have a funny story about an encounter with Chester Arthur I had a few days ago. He tweeted about how he overheard a conversation where some youths were discussing the gayest president and how his name came up.

Let me take this moment to point out that Chester Arthur was not at all gay. In fact, I suspect he was straighter than half of you reading this. Ellen was a pretty lady. And Chet got it on with her at least enough to have three kids.

I replied to him with the magic of Twitter to tell him to just shout "JAMES BUCHANAN WAS GAY FOR PIERCE'S VICE PRESIDENT," and how it works every time. Historically, it's not technically proven, but just look into it a little. It's basically fact.

I squealed like a teenage girl who had just caught Elvis' scarf... thingy... when Chester Arthur retweeted that and said that he had tried but it didn't work.

So yeah, it was a pretty disappointing conversation.

Re: Chester Arthur Sucks

If it wasn't clear: APRIL FOOLS!

But it was pretty clear.

I now intend to refute every point I made yesterday, and redefend Chester Arthur's honor.

"It all starts off with his time as the Collector of the Port of New York. He made a salary higher than that of the president, but you know that a good portion of it never stayed with him but went instead to the Republicans and the Conkling machine."

Well, that's all true. I'm not too proud of Collector Arthur. However, it is said that even during this time, the peak of his corruption, Arthur looked out for the people working under him in the Port of New York. So while he was as much a part of the political machinery as anyone, he was still a decent man.

"He was far more corrupt than Grant's administration had been. All he ever did was work more stubbornly than the Republicans of today to continue the spoils system and allow jobs to continue on patronage. When he was Garfield's VP, he constantly fought against the president's work. Arthur wasn't looking for the nation's interests, he was looking only for Roscoe Conkling's favor."

He was a pretty awful Vice President. He reminds me of John Calhoun almost, so in conflict with his President. I can't say he was looking only for Roscoe Conkling's favor, as Conkling never wanted him to take the job at all, but he was supremely Stalwart against the views of Half-Breed Garfield.

"Then think about the time he spent as president. He found out that he was dying of Bright's disease so he probably decided it was time for him to leave a better impression of himself for history. That's when he worked to end the spoils system. He knew it could never benefit him again. Dead men get no patronage. (Surely Arthur made some dead men vote for Stalwarts in his day, though.)"

Hey, who cares why he worked to end the spoils system? Honestly, I don't believe it's due to the Bright's disease. I think he realized, as he is oft (by standards of Gilded Age presidents) quoted that he was one man and the POTUS was another. He saw the greatness of the office and worked to live up to it.

"But he also allowed a bill that completely banned naturalization and immigration of Chinese people for 10 years, subject to extension? You can't tell me that's a good bill in any way. It's discrimination, mandated by the government. Reconstruction ended two presidents ago, with Hayes, the man who fired Arthur from the Port of New York due to corruption, and now Arthur works to help support a new racial divide forming? Just because the blacks have been freed doesn't mean the country needs a new set of hated people."

Arthur first vetoed the Chinese Exclusion Act. It called for a 20 year renewable banning of immigration and naturalization for the Chinese people. This veto brought the 20 years down to 10. I've never been able to figure out why Arthur signed this version. In my opinion, the best course of action would have been a second veto. Perhaps he knew the nation's hatred of the Chinese was great and that the veto would be overridden, but still let it become law without your signature, at least. But Arthur clearly wasn't the racist one here, due to the initial veto. He had worked for civil rights of blacks as a lawyer before the Civil War, he wasn't likely to turn around and discriminate against another race.

"When you really consider it, Chester A. Arthur was a horrible man, and by far one of the worst presidents of all time.

Hell, he probably wasn't even a real American. Probably born in freaking Canada."

There's so much greatness of Chester Arthur. His years as teacher, as brigadier (acting Quartermaster) general, his turnaround from corruption as president. As for him being one of the worst presidents of all time, some may argue that. I personally find him to be generally underrated and actually a really good president for the times he was in.



I must admit however, I'm not yet convinced that he was actually born in America.

Chester Arthur Sucks

Okay, I admit it. Chester Arthur is, has been, and always will be just a joke. How could such a horrible president be my favorite?

It all starts off with his time as the Collector of the Port of New York. He made a salary higher than that of the president, but you know that a good portion of it never stayed with him but went instead to the Republicans and the Conkling machine.

He was far more corrupt than Grant's administration had been. All he ever did was work more stubbornly than the Republicans of today to continue the spoils system and allow jobs to continue on patronage. When he was Garfield's VP, he constantly fought against the president's work. Arthur wasn't looking for the nation's interests, he was looking only for Roscoe Conkling's favor.

Then think about the time he spent as president. He found out that he was dying of Bright's disease so he probably decided it was time for him to leave a better impression of himself for history. That's when he worked to end the spoils system. He knew it could never benefit him again. Dead men get no patronage. (Surely Arthur made some dead men vote for Stalwarts in his day, though.)

But he also allowed a bill that completely banned naturalization and immigration of Chinese people for 10 years, subject to extension? You can't tell me that's a good bill in any way. It's discrimination, mandated by the government. Reconstruction ended two presidents ago, with Hayes, the man who fired Arthur from the Port of New York due to corruption, and now Arthur works to help support a new racial divide forming? Just because the blacks have been freed doesn't mean the country needs a new set of hated people.

When you really consider it, Chester A. Arthur was a horrible man, and by far one of the worst presidents of all time.

Hell, he probably wasn't even a real American. Probably born in freaking Canada.

Who was the best president of the Gilded Age?

Recently, I put on a test about the Gilded Age the following essay question:
"Who was the best president of the Gilded Age? Why?"

I got answers of Grant, Garfield, Arthur, Cleveland, and Harrison. Sorry, Rutherford B. Hayes. Nobody loves you, apparently.

To be fair, about half of the people who said Arthur only said so because "He's Jay's favorite president and Jay is smart and Jay wouldn't like a bad president."

To this essay, I commented something along the lines of thinking that Cleveland is the best president of the Gilded Age and that Arthur is indeed my favorite, but not the greatest.

Why is Cleveland the best president of the era? In short, because he made good moves regardless of political gain. No one else really seemed very successful at this, except maybe Arthur. But Cleveland had something that Arthur lacked, and that's people who'd renominate him.

Starting in the election, Cleveland knew how to handle himself. The election of 1884 was one of the greatest mud-slinging festivals in history. "Ma, ma, where's my Pa?" yelled Republicans. Cleveland had a bastard child. And so, he stood up and admitted what he had done. The people seem to have forgiven him, as he defeated James G. Blaine of Maine.

In his first term, Cleveland found a surplus. Can you believe that? A national surplus. No debt of trillions of dollars. No debt at all. Negative debt, in fact! But, along the lines of Hamiltonian thinking, Cleveland was embarrassed by this extra money lying around and wanted to get rid of it. (This wasn't immediately accomplished, but the Billion Dollar Congress during Harrison's term sure lost the money.)

In the same term, he also took a firm stand on the place of government in people's lives. There was a drought in Texas and Cleveland vetoed a bill to give Texan farmers seeds. "Though the people should support the government, the government should not support the people." This statement can't be a popular thing to say, but Ol' Grover takes a stand against the strong Congress and wins this round.

Like many other presidents of the era, Cleveland attempted to lower the tariff rates. But Congress wasn't losing this round. As happened to other presidents, Congress starts with a nice low tariff bill and then tacks on more and more until it's basically the exact opposite of what Cleveland wanted. Congress does win this round.

However, as I said, Cleveland is not the only president this happened to. Harrison would soon sign the McKinley Tariff, the highest in our nation's history. Arthur attempted to lower rates, but Congress would only almost negligibly lower them.

Cleveland also made a very important move for decreasing sectionalism in politics. His cabinet had two former Confederates in it. It may seem to you that "Well it was 20 years since the Civil War, obviously no one cares anymore about former Confederates." Well, that's not really true. It had only been 8 years since Reconstruction had ended, and Jim Crow laws ran rampant in the South, along with grandfather clauses and literacy tests, anything to keep down the blacks almost as they had been pre-Civil War. The South and North were vastly different and were voting vastly differently. Cleveland began to soothe the tension.

Speaking of the Civil War, veterans really really wanted nice pensions. Congress and the presidents were generally satisfied to give these men such pensions. But Cleveland was the first president since Andrew Johnson to not be a Civil War veteran himself and had no problem vetoing bills for these pensions.

Of course, Cleveland lost to Benjamin Harrison in 1888. But he still won the popular vote, and came back to win the election of 1892.

In his second term, Cleveland no longer had to worry about an embarrassing surplus. Instead, he could take solace in the Panic of 1893. As always, overspeculation is the main cause of this depression. But a greater problem arose during this depression for Cleveland.

People were exchanging their old greenbacks for gold currency. The banks were required by law to give away the gold. The Treasury's gold reserve kept shrinking and shrinking. It shrank below the "safe" level of $100 million.

Cleveland makes the most unpopular and most necessary move of either of his terms. He goes to rich man J.P. Morgan and buys $65 million worth of gold from him. People think the government has sold out, but Cleveland quite possibly saved the United States economy.

In conclusion, Cleveland is clearly the greatest president of the Gilded Age. He's not top 10 overall material, but for the time he was in, he did a phenomenal job. He wasn't afraid of making unpopular moves that he felt were right, and he avoided scandals and corruption. If he were to run for president today, I'd seriously consider him as worthy of my vote.

Civil War Experience

Not long ago, I was discussing with my friends the effectiveness of commanding generals as presidents. But that's another blog.

This blog begins with the effectiveness of a single general. Ulysses S. Grant, the nation's 18th president. He was the greatest Union general of the Civil War, and one of the top generals in our history. However, as president, he proved to be a poor judge of character and was generally ineffective. In fact, I would argue that he was the worst president of the Gilded Age (which includes Grant through McKinley).

And so this got me thinking, could greatness in the Civil War be inversely proportional to greatness in the Executive Branch?

The next president, Rutherford B. Hayes, reached the rank of brigadier general and was brevetted major general by the end of the war. He was wounded 5 times. He had some military successes. And, like Grant, he was a pretty poor president.

Next up is James Garfield. He became a brigadier general sooner than Hayes and worked as Chief of Staff under Rosecrans, commander of the Army of Cumberland. Garfield was a good president until he got shot. So he actually didn't get much done.

Chester Arthur was too, brigadier general. He was eventually quatermaster general for New York. He saw no combat, but his years of organizing New York to send troops to battle are often said to be his best. He was, however, removed from the position in 1863 for political reasons. As president, he had two major positive accomplishments, one major poor decision, and was otherwise uneventful. He probably ranks as the second best Gilded Age president, behind...

Grover Cleveland, who dodged the draft by paying for someone else to go. This man is probably the greatest Gilded Age president, as I have already said.

Benjamin Harrison reached the rank of... you guessed it... brigadier general near the end of the war. He's not a stand out commander, and he's not a stand out president.

William McKinley was the last president to have experience in the Civil War. He actually fought under Hayes. Go figure. He reached the ranks of Captain and brevet major. Now, I can't tell you exactly what they are, but they're lower than brigadier general, I can tell you that. This man brought back power to the Executive Branch and is generally considered the first modern president.

Now, to rank these men by order of success in the Civil War:
1. Ulysses Grant
2. Rutherford Hayes
3. James Garfield
4. Chester Arthur
5. Benjamin Harrison
6. William McKinley
7. Grover Cleveland

And by success as president:
1. William McKinley
2. Grover Cleveland
3. Chester Arthur
4. Benjamin Harrison
5. Rutherford Hayes
6. James Garfield
7. Ulysses Grant

So, no it's not a perfect correlation. But I think there's something to be said for Civil War successes vs. Presidential successes.

Presidents' Day

...is quite possibly the most worthless holiday we have in the United States.

It sprung from celebrations of Lincoln's Birthday (on February 12) and Washington's Birthday (on February 22) and so now Presidents' Day is celebrated on a Monday in February, I suppose the third Monday, and we all get a three-day weekend instead of two days off.

But this is not my problem with the upcoming holiday. My problem is people don't celebrate the presidents. Not once have I heard of someone preaching about the greatness of Abraham Lincoln on this holiday. Nor have I seen someone wearing a George Washington t-shirt.

If we're getting this day off, why aren't people celebrating even these greatest presidents?

But in addition, people further shun the lesser presidents. Maybe they'll think of Washington and Lincoln, maybe even the Roosevelts. But what about the Millard Fillmores and the William McKinleys and the Benjamin Harrisons of our land? Isn't it their holiday too?

But people don't celebrate any of this. So why should this holiday still exist?


That being said, on Monday I'm wearing a Chester Arthur t-shirt and posting multiple blogs about some of the presidents who get no love.

Top 10: Coolest Looking VPs

In my last of the top 10 lists for a while, I examine the Vice Presidents, in terms of how awesome they look. Their names are links to pictures.

Presidential names in parentheses.

10. Millard Fillmore (Taylor)
This seems to be the only picture to do him justice.

9. James Sherman (Taft)
I don't know quite what it is about him. Maybe the spectacles just pull off the right effect.

8. Thomas Hendricks (Cleveland 22)
I think the hair/sideburns just work for Hendricks.

7. Adlai Stevenson (Cleveland 24)
Oddly enough, the baldness only makes him look more awesome.

6. Garret Hobart (McKinley)
Just like Adlai, but a step up in cool.

5. Thomas Marshall (Wilson)
He kinda seems like an ancestor to Eric Foreman on That 70s Show.

4. Charles Curtis (Hoover)
Just a good looking moustache.

3. Schuyler Colfax (Grant)
The only Vice President with a beard. This baffles me.

2. Chester Arthur (Garfield)
Gotta love the friendly mutton chops. Or the "Chester Arthur" as they are sometimes known. Which I plan to grow someday.

1. Levi Morton (Benjamin Harrison)
Chester Arthur just got out-"Chester Arthur"ed.

The Gilded Age Test

Following is a set of 20 multiple choice questions about the Gilded Age. Submit your answers to me via whatever you want, and I'll give you your grade.

1. Approximately how many pairs of pants did Chester Arthur have while in office?
a 20
b 40
c 60
d 80

2. Why is the Pendleton Act significant?
a Reformed civil service
b Created the presidential life of succession
c Gave land to Native Americans
d Ended Reconstruction

3. Which listed presidential candidate won the popular vote, but lost the election?
a Benjamin Harrison
b Winfield Hancock
c Samuel Tilden
d Millard Fillmore

4. The Panic of 1873 occurred while ________ was president.
a James Garfield
b Rutherford B. Hayes
c Ulysses S. Grant
d Andrew Johnson

5. Industrialization was a major theme of the Gilded Age. When was the Industrial Revolution begun in America?
a Before the Civil War
b Before the Revolutionary War
c During Reconstruction
d After Reconstruction

6. Which of the following pieces of legislation did Chester Arthur sign?
a Dawes Act
b Chinese Exclusion Act
c Sherman Anti-Trust Act
d McKinley Tariff Act

7. What presidential election was won by 1 electoral vote, making it the closest in terms of electoral votes in history?
a 1876
b 1880
c 2000
d 1824

8. What presidential election was won by about 2000 popular votes nationally, making it the closest in popular vote in history?
a 1876
b 1880
c 2000
d 1824

9. Benjamin Harrison was grandson to William Henry Harrison, the nation's 9th president. What else made him special?
a He was the "Centennial President"
b He remained unmarried
c He had a Ph.D.
d He used more vetoes than any other president

10. What branch of the federal government was most in control during the Gilded Age?
a Executive
b Legislative
c Judicial
d Parliamentary

11. What did all the bearded presidents have in common (aside from beards)?
a Same party
b Not re-elected to a second term
c Assassinated
d Vice presidents without beards

12. "Good ballplayers make good citizens" according to Chester Arthur. However, he was not a ballplayer. Which of the following was he?
a Governor
b Lawyer
c Doctor
d Know-Nothing

13. What defines the end of the Gilded Age?
a William McKinley's presidency, because he was a strong executive
b Grover Cleveland's second term, because of economic troubles reshaping the country
c Anti-trust legislation being passed for the first time
d A series of clean-shaven presidents

14. Thomas Nast took down whom with a cartoon?
a Chester Arthur
b Roscoe Conkling
c Boss Tweed
d Adolf Hitler

15. "No man ever entered the Presidency so profoundly and widely distrusted, and no one ever retired... more generally respected," said Alexander K. McClure. Who was he talking about?
a Ulysses S. Grant
b Rutherford B. Hayes
c James Garfield
d Chester A. Arthur

16. A president was assassinated during the Gilded Age. Who was it?
a James Garfield
b Chester Arthur
c Grover Cleveland
d Benjamin Harrison

17. Which of the following did not have experience in the Civil War?
a Ulysses S. Grant
b Rutherford B. Hayes
c Grover Cleveland
d James Garfield

18. The Presidential Polonaise was written by whom?
a Chester Arthur
b John Sousa
c Francis Scott Key
d a scribe

19. How long did the Chinese Exclusion Act exclude Chinese?
a 20 years, subject to extension
b 10 years, subject to extension
c 10 years, non-renewable
d 20 years, non-renewable

20. February 22, 1885, Chester Arthur did what?
a Die
b Shave
c Dedicate the Washington Monument
d Refurbish the White House

The Good Samaritan

Know that story told by Jesus? The Good Samaritan?

In a nutshell, the people expected to help a dying man don't, and the person thought to be evil does help the dying man.

The Good Samaritan, then, could be likened to Chester Arthur.

When he first ascended to the presidency, the nation collectively groaned, saying "Well these four years aren't going to be worth a pile of horse poop as far as civil service reform."

But, as we know today, Chester Arthur is known as "The Father of Civil Service Reform" because it was under him that Congress passed the Pendleton Act in 1883. It was completely unexpected for the Stalwart president to go completely against the Stalwart platform of "To the victor goes the spoils" and actually take a knife and shove it through the heart of the spoils system.

Excerpt from "Gentleman Boss: The Life and Times of Chester Arthur"

In honor of Chester Arthur Appreciation Day, an excerpt from a book about him.

The Civil War is raging and Chester is the brigadier general of New York.

~~~~~

After New York's initial thirty-eight regiments were recruited, all sorts of adventurers flocked to Washington to wangle commissions to raise troops. The War Department was desperate for manpower and frequently authorized prominent citizens to raise a regiment. Once permission was recieved, these gentlemen dubbed themselves high-ranking officers, set up headquarters, surrounded themselves with subordinates (who often purchased their commissions), passed out handbills, and began to recruit. At one point there were near a hundred such organizations in the state.

One such successful applicant was "Billy" Wilson, an aldderman who represented one of New York City's most crime-ridden areas. Wilson recruited a gang of toughs from his district who proceeded to plunder local restaurants in full uniform. Police were unwilling to crack down on Wilson and his boys because of their great popularity in the vicinity. The harassed restaurant owners finally appealed to the state for relief, and Governor Morgan ordered Arthur to put a stop to Wilso's marauding.

Upon request, Billy appeared one day at Arthur's office and swaggered through the door in a colonel's uniform. When told of Arthur's objections to his recent activities, Wilson bellowed:

"Neither you nor the governor has anything to do with me. I am a colonel in the United States service, and you've got no right to order me."

"You are not a colonel," Arthur replied indignantly, "and you will not be until you have raised your regiment to its quote of men and received your commission."

"Well, I've got my shoulder-straps anyway," said Wilson, "and as long as I wear them, I don't want no orders from any of you fellows."

At that, Arthur rose to his feet, ripped the straps from Wilson's shoulders, flung him into a chair, and had him put under arrest.

~~~~~


Arthur's work during the Civil War is often considered to be his best work. He was honest and efficient as brigadier general and quartermaster general through 1863.

It isn't until after this when he began to fall into the political machine of Roscoe Conkling and become a strong supporter of the spoils system.

Presidential Polonaise

You probably know "Hail to the Chief."

What song could be more appropriate for the President of the United States?

Songs adapted from the Scots are, after all, extremely American and every president (at least since John Tyler, when the song was first used for the president) accepted the song.

Every president except Chester Arthur.

When Arthur learned of the origins of the song, he asked John Philip Sousa to write an alternative tune.

Sousa responded with the "Presidential Polonaise." Here is a link for your listening pleasure. The polonaise is a Polish musical style in 3/4 time. However Sousa manages to give the song a more Spanish feel. It's designed to keep people moving through the White House.

The song was first performed in 1886, both after Arthur's term and his death. The song did not last and "Hail to the Chief" quickly returned as the song of the presidents. It's a shame, really. "Presidential Polonaise" is an enjoyable tune and had great potential.

Instead, history continues to try and erase Chester Arthur from the minds of Americans.

Song Review: "The Presidents" by Jonathan Coulton

Link to the Song

Lyrics:

Washington came first and he was perfect.
John Adams kept us out of war with France.
Jefferson made Louisiana Purchase.
In 1812 James Madison kicked the British in the pants.

James Monroe told Europe they could suck it.
John Quincy Adams looked just like his dad.
Andrew Jackson got rid of all the Indians.
Van Buren served one term, but he wasn't bad.

William Henry Harrison died early.
John Tyler annexed Texas from Mexico.
James K. Polk fought Mexico to keep it.
Taylor was a Mexican War hero.

Fillmore gave a boat to Commodore Perry.
Pierce repealed the Missouri Compromise.
Buchanan saw the Civil War's beginnings.
Lincoln saved the Union, then he died.

Andrew Johnson just survived impeachment.
General Grant enjoyed a drink or two.
Rutherford B. Hayes ended Reconstruction.
Garfield was assassinated in 1882.

Arthur suspended Chinese immigration.
Cleveland made the railroad people squirm.
Harrison signed the Sherman Anti-Trust Act.
Grover Cleveland served another term.

McKinley kicked the Spanish out of Cuba.
Roosevelt was handy with a gun.
Taft was big and fat and had a mustache.
Wilson kicked some ass in World War I.

Harding said "Let's Laissez Faire with business."
Coolidge made the roaring 20s roar.
Hoover screwed the pooch in the Great Depression.
Roosevelt beat the Nazis in the war.

Truman dropped the bomb on Hiroshima.
Eisenhower kept the Commies well in hand.
Kennedy was killed by a magic bullet.
Johnson murdered kids in Vietnam.

Nixon was a sweating, filthy liar.
Ford gave Nixon pardon for his crimes.
Carter lusted in his heart for peanuts.
Reagan won the Cold War, and lost his mind.

George Bush Sr. poked at Saddam Hussein.
Clinton gave an intern a cigar.
W's legacy's a work in progress.
That is all the Presidents so far.

In the year 2005 we're out of money.
Somewhere, surely, freedom's on the march.
I don't like to make political statements.


This song, first and foremost, is appealing to the ear. It's important for a song to sound good.

Lyrically some of the things Coulton says about the presidents are worthless, incorrect, or I just don't like them.

Most egregiously, he says James Garfield was assassinated in 1882. He was assassinated in 1881. How this error made it into the song just baffles me. You have to do the research.

Surely there's something better to say about John Quincy Adams than him looking like his dad. Plus I don't think they even look remotely similar. I mean, JQA is an ugly man, but his father looks pretty alright for the times.

Arthur did suspend Chinese immigration, but the bill had come up at least once prior to his presidency only to be vetoed. He also vetoed it himself once, signing it only after the term of no Chinese immigrants was halved.

Maybe I just wasn't alive during Carter's administration and am missing the joke, but "Carter lusted in his heart for peanuts?" On one hand, it captures the way no one took him seriously, but on the other why not come up with some fact about him?

The song isn't all bad though, the line about James Madison kicking the British in the pants, while leaving out that America was also kicked in the pants, is probably the best line in the song. "Reagan won the Cold War and lost his mind" is a close runner-up.

Overall, this is a pretty good song, and would be a great way to just get a quick tidbit about all the presidents into a young audience.

What's Wrong With a Foreign Born President?

The Constitution clearly states that all presidents must be natural-born citizens. This has come up as an issue twice in our history, with Barack Obama and Chester Arthur. And I understand that this was originally made to keep foreign intrests out of the White House.

But what purpose is left today?

I know your first thought may be election of some closet terrorist. But do you honestly believe the people would elect someone like that? I have more faith in America than that.

Now I'm not saying let some French guy come over to America for a year than decide to run for president. But why can a man be Governator of California but not be president? We need a Constitutional Amendment allowing Americans born on foreign soil and even naturalized citizens run for president. Make them live in the country for 20 years. Deny anyone who has been a dual citizen with any other country at any point in the past fifteen years. But don't discriminate against good Americans whose parents just weren't in the right place when their child was born.

Half-Breeds and Stalwarts

The Republicans of the late 1870s and 1880s were divided into two factions, the half-breeds and the stalwarts. These two groups were considered political enemies. They faught bitterly to get their candidates nominated over the opposing faction's candidates. They saught to block the platform of the other faction. When one faction was nominated as president, the other was necessarily VP nominated to satisfy the other faction.

And this was all over a single issue.

If such bitterness arises over one thing, in this case the spoils system, then how can a party stand? If the current Democrats became so broken up over healthcare that they became factionized, all they would do is hurt their own party. They still have the same overall agenda, but they decide that oh this one issue is supreme and if we can't agree on that we can't be friends anymore.

It's really stupid to factionize in this way, and it just makes it all the more important that Chester Arthur rose above factions in his day.

Chester Arthur is special

...and not just for his facial hair. He's the only president to have no animals while in the White House.

There were some interesting animals over the years. Jefferson had bear cubs. John Quincy Adams had alligators. Badass Andrew Jackson had fighting cocks.

I can understand the idea of having a dog, like Bo Obama, or a cat. But Teddy Roosevelt had at least 25 animals. Is it really necessary to have a one legged rooster, TR? Really?

I was amazed by the media surrounding the First Family of Obama as they were picking out a dog. War in Iraq? I haven't heard about it. But did you hear that Obama got a Portugese Water Dog? I know, I expected a Chesapeake Bay Retriever in honor of TR's "Sailor Boy."

Presidents have the right to have a nice family pet. But the media needs to learn the world doesn't depend on it. And the First Families need to keep it under control. The president doesn't need to become like the crazy cat lady, except instead of cats they have alligators, badgers, cows, duikers, and all this other crazy stuff.

What Would Chester Arthur Do? Immigration

(Presidential Rankings will be done tomorrow.)

In honor of Chester Arthur Awareness Day, a new feature begins! What would (President) Do?

Today we examine what Chester Arthur would do about immigrants, specifically Mexicans.

Chester Arthur's administration was the first to pass a general immigration law. In 1882, it excluded people in poverty, felons, and crazy people.

Congress at his time passed the Chinese Exclusion Act, preventing Chinese from immigrating into the US for a 20 year period. Arthur vetoed. Congress revised the bill to be a ten year period, and then it was renewable every decade. Arthur signed this version of the bill.

Clearly, Arthur doesn't have a problem with enacting laws that prevent some people from entering into the United States. The first law excluding paupers, criminals, and the insane doesn't too much apply to the Mexicans. However, it can be assumed there are criminals in Mexico, as well as poor people, and insane people. These groups, Arthur would likely try to legislate away. We know from experience that illegal immigration happens anyway and making it illegal for these groups to enter the United States would do little to nothing. Most Mexicans are coming over because they could be considered paupers anyway.

Arthur was not an initiator in the Chinese Exclusion Act, and at first vetoed it. But he was convinced to sign a watered-down version. As a result, it could be assumed that if the country has enough anti-Mexican sentiment to get a bill passed through Congress, Arthur would sign it as long as he didn't feel it was too strong or against any previous judicial or foreign relations decisions.

That's how the Gentleman President would handle it. The question becomes, would you vote for a candidate who would handle immigration in this way?

My Faith in Humanity is Restored

Today I was talking to a friend of mine after school. The lad doesn't say much, but I rather like him. I decided to ask him about his college search thus far, and found he'd like to major in either History or Archaeology. I don't know diddly about the latter, but I talked about the former.

This boy knew who Chester Arthur was.

I had never talked to him about Chet before, and honestly he didn't know anything about him. But unlike most people I've talked to, he at least knew the name and connected it with presidents. And then he actually asked about him so he could expand his knowledge.

Prior to this, I was speaking with a Latin teacher. We were talking about my college plans and got to how I was considering teaching History. Of course, this also led to mentions of the Gentleman President. This Latin teacher also knew the name and connected him to the presidency. He too asked about him.


Now this alone pretty much made my day, but then in doing research to try to come up with a topic, I came across . Go read the page.

Yep, that's right, the first other presidential oddity listed is about Chester Arthur's pants.


People are pretty alright.

The Elections of 2008 and 1880

Obama haters in the election of 2008 came up with the wonderfully original and wonderfully valid idea to say that Obama had not been born on American soil and that he was thus ineligible to be president. Of course, this claims were extremely false, Obama produced proof that he was eligible, and all was good with the world.

Vice Presidential candidate of 1880, Chester A. Arthur was son of a Vermont woman and an Irish man. Arthur Hinman was hired to look into the circumstances of his birth. First he tried to claim Arthur was born in Ireland, and came to America as a teenager. Later he claimed Chet was born in Canada. Of course, these claims did not prevent Chester Arthur from taking the office after Garfield and he had won the election, no one took them too seriously.

Anybody see the parallel yet?

I knew of this connection the moment I heard about accusations against Obama's American-ness. But nobody else seemed to know. I was distraught that it didn't seem to come up whenever a news story about Obama possibly not being natural-born came up.

But one day, I did find a source that connected the two. Stephen Colbert. It took a parody of news to make a connection of present issues to a past event. Americans really need to learn their history as it's pertinent. I can understand the common citizen not knowing this right off the bat, but some experts should have come out and taken Obama and Arthur and showed the nation why the two men were connected through this event.


While I'm talking Obama/Arthur, Chester Arthur was the first President to have Native American in his blood. Many people believe Obama is the first president to have African in his blood. I don't buy it, but that's another blog.

Chester Alan Arthur, 1881-1885

"I don't think we had better go into the minute secrets of the campaign, so far as I know them, because I see the reporters are present, who are taking it all down. If it were not for the reporters, I would tell you the truth."

Chester Alan Arthur is without a doubt my favorite president.  Yes, out of all 43 of them.  Yes, I prefer him over TR, Lincoln, and Washington.  Almost everyone who has ever heard me say that I like him has considered it to be a big joke.  That "almost everyone" includes the man who taught me AP US History, some of my closest friends, and... well just about everyone except my little sister who I personally taught about presidents.  And so what better way to spend a night on the Internet then finally and formally defending my boy Chet?

Arthur is without a doubt not the greatest president of all time.  He isn't even close.  But a person's favorites are not always the best.  There are fans of the Baltimore Orioles, the Detroit Lions, and Boris Said, why not Chester Arthur?

Let's get this point out of the way.  Chester Arthur can be very funny.  I've heard a comment that he looks like a tuskless walrus.  I looked at a picture again and chuckled to myself as I realized it was true.  There's also something to be said for his facial hair.  I really wish we could get some good presidental facial hair now, but that's another blog.  The man had 80 pairs of pants.  Not only did he have 80 pairs of pants, but he often changed pants more than once in a single day.  All of this is information worth laughing at.  And yes, it does help me call him my favorite.  Who would want a boring old not funny president for their favorite?

Now we come to some actual facts about what the man did.  He was the son of Irish-born and Vermont-born parents in 1829.  (Over 40 years later he changed some records to make himself seem a year younger.  Mid-life crisis?)  He was a lawyer who helped bring forth some decisions for blacks' rights and anti-slavery in New York prior to his presidency, and was eventually appointed Collector of the Port of New York by President Grant.

Here's where it gets interesting.  Many people in this position prior to Chester were often working in ways that were... well they were doing things that were illegal.  Arthur was removed from this position by the next president, Rutherford B. Hayes, in Hayes' attempt to combat such corruption based upon the spoils system.  (The spoils system is basically giving people government jobs because they helped you out or agree with you politically.)

In the next presidental election, James Garfield is chosen as the Republican candidate.  However the Party has two factions.  Garfield is a Half-Breed.  To appease the other faction, the Stalwarts, Chester Arthur is nominated as VP.  Long story short, they win.  Garfield becomes the 20th President and Arthur becomes the 20th Vice President.

All is fine and dandy until Garfield is assassinated.  He was shot on July 2, 1881, but he just would not die.  Nowadays, the VP would step in pretty much right away as an interim president.  At the time, there was not so clear an idea of what to do, and Arthur was reluctant to appear to be grabbing power.  This was alright, because Congress wasn't in session anyway.  Garfield did finally die on September 19, and Arthur ascended to the presidency.

The single most important act of his time in office was the passage of the Pendleton Civil Service Reform Act.  With great irony, the Stalwart president rose above factions of his party and signed a bill that began to combat the Stalwart-favored spoils system.  Other than that, nothing all too important occurred.

He put in a bid for reelection in 1884 but wasn't renominated by the Republicans.  He later died of Bright's Disease and is the most recent president to never have a vice president.

And if all that logically laid out argument wasn't enough, Mark Twain agrees with me.  He said, "It would be hard indeed to better President Arthur's administration.

And so this concludes my reasoning for claiming Chester Alan Arthur, 21st President of the United States, to be my favorite out of all men to lead this country.  He may not have been the "best" nor the most effective in passing all of his agenda, but he is and probably will always be my boy.

P.S. Don't think that this is the last you'll see of Chester Arthur here.  There's more to discuss.  :)